Readings (Year B):
Joshua 24:1 – 2a, 15 – 17, 18b
Psalms 34:2 – 3, 16 – 17, 18 – 19, 20 – 21
Ephesians 5:21 – 32 or 5:2a, 25 – 32
John 6:60 – 69
Reflection: Be subordinate to one another out of reverence to Christ
I remember one of the most disturbing experiences that I’ve had as a pastor. It happened during a marriage counseling session, with a couple who came from another church. The husband admitted to beating his wife, and said that he had no choice but to punish her physically, because she would not obey him; that this was necessary in a godly marriage. That was a sobering reminder of how misreading scripture can lead to very real abuse and suffering.
We’re looking today at a portion of Ephesians, chapter five, beginning with verse 22. It is part of a larger section that describes domestic relationships. Ephesians was ostensibly written by the apostle Paul; some scholars believe it was penned by a disciple, in the apostle’s name—but we’ll call the writer “Paul” for this discussion.
Paul begins the section with a thesis statement: “Be subordinate to one another out of reverence for Christ.” A single verb in the Greek—translated as “be subordinate”—carries on through the next three sentences in our English Bibles. The emphasis here is on mutual submission: in a healthy marriage each partner seeks to outdo the other in caring. It reflects the larger vision of God’s kin-dom, where love connects all members.
Verses 22 to 24 are one single sentence in Greek. However, some major English Bible translations split that sentence with a section heading—which violates the grammar of the original manuscript and makes no translational sense except to highlight the wife’s submission.
Paul says in verse 23 that the husband is the “head”—kephale—of the wife. This has been interpreted to mean “authority,” that the husband is boss of the wife. But if the writer intended such, he would have used another word, “archon.” The metaphor here is that the head is the source of nutrition for the body—just as the husband is to nurture his wife. Verse 24 then applies the call for mutual submission to the wife’s half of that responsibility.
In this passage, there are two admonitions to wives; then there are five instructions to husbands. Perhaps Paul thought the men would have a harder time hearing this message? First, husbands are required to love their wives. There are multiple Greek words for love: the word here, agape, denotes self-giving, unconditional love. Men are to devote themselves to their wife’s welfare as Christ gave himself sacrificially to the church.
This call for reciprocal submission and service in marriage contrasts with the norms of first century Greco-Roman culture. The philosopher Demosthenes said: “Prostitutes are for pleasure, concubines for cohabitation, and wives for bearing (male) children.” Seneca said, “Women are married to be divorced.”
Paul challenges the one-sided patriarchy of his time when he says, near the end of this passage, “husbands should love their wives as their own bodies.” When originally written, Paul’s mutually respectful vision for covenant partnership transcended its cultural setting. And these Spirit-inspired verses still provide a recipe for married happiness.
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