Readings (Year B):
Isaiah 50:5 – 9a
Psalms 116:1 – 2, 3 – 4, 5 – 6, 8 – 9
James 2:14 – 18
Mark 8:27 – 35
Reflection: Love, then do as you will
Discerning God’s will is central to Christian life, and though it’s intended to birth clarity, it seems just as often to be a stumbling block: “Do I follow in the family business or go off on my own?” “If serving the poor in the city is such a good thing, then why am I so restless?”
You would figure Peter, of all people, would have a solid grasp of God’s will. The rock of the church, chosen to witness the transfiguration, Peter was as intimate with Jesus as anyone. For all this, or maybe because of it, he was full of self-will and quick to assert it. That tension between self-will and God’s will is displayed in today’s gospel reading from Mark.
On the road, Jesus questions the disciples: “Who do people say that I am?” Peter seems to perceive the truth: “You are the Christ.” Jesus then explains how he must suffer to fulfill his mission as the Son of Man. As we might imagine a caring, if somewhat overzealous, friend doing, Peter takes Jesus aside and tries to dissuade him. “Get behind me, Satan!” Jesus answers. “You are not thinking as God does, but as human beings do.”
The problem with self-will is its tendency to blur the presence of God here and now. Peter recognized the importance of Jesus but wanted things to coincide with his desires, his vision of how things should stand. By force of will, he tries to steer Jesus away from suffering.
Do we recognize elements of ourselves in this interaction? When things are going well and according to plan, we are content to pray, “Thy will be done.” But are we as serene and trusting when our ambitions and life-trajectories get shot to hell? When relationships fall apart, when sickness or injury strike out of nowhere, when war or violence encroach? What is the will of God in these moments of terrifying powerlessness?
As a kid, I remember doing mazes to pass the time, making my way to the center, trying to avoid the dead-ends. It seems many of us continue to view God’s will for us as a maze which has one right path and a lot of dead-ends. If we take a wrong turn or make the wrong choice, we get stuck, which would explain the vocational anxiety nowadays; we think there’s only one right way, and we need to get it perfect.
But what if instead we envisioned God’s will for us as a labyrinth full of twists and turns that nevertheless lead to the center? St. Augustine famously preached, “Love, and do what you will.” If love is our spiritual center, then there are ultimately no wrong turns, no dead-ends. Even when we come up against what Sister Constance Fitzgerald terms “impasses,” those times in our lives of faith when we feel trapped with neither a way forward nor a way back, Jesus continues to call: Let go of the life you thought you should be living. Love, then do what you will.
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